Today, i was at sch with sihui and lingwei for the career cum resume talk. It was overwhelming, the sheer reality of stepping into the workforce is not something I wish to acknowledge at this point of time. Cause really it just means..hey hey, time to grow up girl. Argh..can i not? And so today we spent a great deal of time at the biological sciences side, cause they have a pretty futuristic looking cafe. Futuristic is really subjective actually, since the rest of nbs looks a tad like an abandoned school hall all on its own. I'm glad sihui is doing well, though it is quite plausible that she may not be fully showing us what is her true emotions, so as not to worry us. But i'll always remember her hug in the nj big toilet when i was crying buckets, and at the sanctury too. These are the times where it would be just the two of us alone, and we are just talking, and im not hiding anything with her. Sihui mentioned about having an innate feeling of ease and trust with a person before feeling like you wanna pursue a deeper friendship with him or her. I would say, she does give me that feeling, when i look into her eyes, i see someone with a lot of love to give. But then again, the nj girls are all warm. Like xiu, who always keeps a lookout for us, bin, who is quietly giving her listening ear, dailin who listens and smiles her innocent smile, laishan who bakes mean brownies and mash pototoes, yo with her toothy grin and her shrill laughter, taryn who always gives us hugs, and russell who is always deciding on eating roti prata or that fried dried noodles which only sells on tuesdays...i think. They, of whom brings back a flood of warm memories. Sihui's friendship is always one that of very low maintenance, we seldom talk on the phone, nor do we go out tog, the friendship was fostered thru little pocket of moments where we steal aside to talk to each other like getting food during recess, after assembly, during civics, and during 2.4 km runs. Besides that, there was minimal real contact..so the dynamics of the friendship is really different. So it is what makes it amazing, cause really i can sense the love coming from sihui. It is safe being with her, cause i know she is genuine. The feeling is good, no need for pretense. The three of us were propped up in high chairs at the cafe, and talking about marriage, on whether we would eventually marry one whom we love indeed. Now what idealised shit is that. I think it is more of the make-do theory, and the whos there at the time test. How random it is, considering that who comes in and comes out of your life is a factor whom you cant control. What you can have some influence on is whether they stay, but still it also depends on if the feeling is mutual too. No point if it isnt. Bien sur. I digressed. After that i headed to pacific coffee with jh,joel,clarence, boon, then to the le restaurant francais. The food was not particularly wow-some, half my brain was on my bed, the other half was in the clouds. I guess prolly when you are too damned tired, hallucination does kick in at some point of time. I must be kicking in then. It din help that the weather was dripping wet. And so i went home with joel on the train. It was kind of constipated talking to him, cause we were not well-acquainted, and i was ticking off topics in my head to talk about, since i really dun want an awkward silence to befall. It is weird. bUT later he stated to open up a little..but not a lot. I'm typing one eye closed one eye open, cause im zombing away, and i must indeed crawl to my bed and dream of my fairy-tale. so its my once upon a time, there was a forever ever more....