Haven been blogging lately partially cause I was too lazy to log into blogger, partially because I know I badly wanted to holler out and all. But living in this civilised world, or should I say in this spotless social cordiality, the above-the-surface conversation is about as clean as dirt swept under the carpet. Something along that line. So at times words are just about to spill out from my flopping mouth, but the brain sends an alarm signal, to hole back the words from spilling forth lest they do much damage later. This gives me a very pent up feeling, since words are my source to spew the frustrated nerves within. Anyways,this whole inner emotional rah-rah may just be the inexplicable Pms, raging its stupendous prowess over my moods again. How sickening not being able to control what it is within myself. So I decided, a little less conversation is good for that matter. However distant it may feel. Somehow I don't really feel emotionally connected to some of my friends, which is very disturbing cause I do consider them close to me. It is sad to say that the conversation always skirts on the surface, and to me it is very unnerving. Cant wait for some progression in that. Emotional connection is something oh-so-hard to find. On a lighter note, tomorrow I shall be starting on a french module. No idea how it would go, but shall just take a look see first..(anyways it is still add-drop period..hah). Ah..I think it is not a good idea to write about what shit of "on a lighter note", when it is totally not what I am feeling. Bah. Caught in a rut, again. Okay. Recount of events today. Went to school to meet a career coach with Wx and Sh. It took some two hours, to clear a whole lot of doubts! Which is really good actually..I mean we finally do have a more concrete idea of the bigger picture, rather then just swimming in the academic fog. So it was good, was good, was good. Ah..I am not even convincing myself. Even the smile looks half-constipated.