211: ditty, dutty and dotty

Sure does feel good now. I had a schedule mapped out, but thats only half the work done. Getting down to it is the main issue. Psych modules arent exactly at the most convenient of times, but i suppose there has to be some degree of "sacrificing some comfort" for something you want. Thats the next best thing after french2 mods being totally clashed on with my core mods, and bizlaw mods perpetually flying off like hotcakes. And...i realised that this blog is now a year old. awww...I am getting a little sentimental feel here. Haha..quite ridiculous in a funny way. Well I guess it is a bummer when small little things get snowballed and blown out of proportion. Sigh... Actually i have nothing else more constructive to say other than i ripped off a slew of mp3's from livejournal. That made my day real good, with all the indie rock remixes and electronic sounds. Shifts my itunes from one that is rnb invaded to at least something different. =) And....Pocketdwellers are good! I just love their sound alot. And...i cant get that sean paul's song out of my head! Major earwax! Does anybody here get the same glorious kick by listening to music as I do? hmmmm!

210: tinsel lights a-brighting

Strangely enough, althought blogger dearest says that I last pooped around, five days ago, which is on the 23rd, I feel as though I haven been here for sometime. Haha..anyways..yes, christmas. My cousins came over last fri from Munich, which happened to be the last day of caroling. Anyways, Christmas morning was church service, followed by last minute shopping and a dinner at Aunt Flor's place, then back to my aunt's. I always love going to Aunt Flor's place. Her house and the food, absooolutely decadent. Lush deco, and sinful indulgence. You see, this year there was a fondue fountain. So much effort goes into its preperation of food and all, just to create a comfy ambience. Totally appreciate her effort. And ya, i saw Melissa and her sis, Eugenia. Didn't really talk as much as we would usually do though. But i see she's doing well at the SMU, and apparently, Mel was Vian's first three mths classmate at Sajc. Small world we have here. Eugenia has this really gentle demeanor about her, quite unlike her older sis, whom i didnt see that day. Anyways, the presents this year was more than i could ask for. My parents were really sweet. They hung a christmas stocking at my door knob, and i woke up to see a stocking on it. Its like deja vu you know, cause all the way till when i was eight, I still had those stocking things hung beside the window. Its the kind of squeamish childish joy. Yep, and so in it was a phone. That v3 phone in pink. How sweet is that! I didnt know my parents had a romantic streak to them. =) Its a renewal in faith, to be able to reflect upon the past yr and see God's grace in many areas. Of which i am quite frankly, not deserving to receive it. So, i saw this written on a card in church. Nothing you do can make God love you less. It was He that gave the ability to love, and the least you can do is love God with however much capacity your heart can offer. How very apt, methinks. Christmas is not ONLY about receiving and giving to people whom you love. See, thats wholly missing the point. I think the phase "season of love" is sprouting up in every miniscule corner, i cant help feeling that its ridiculous. Christmas is about God. Anything else is stands in the fringe regions. So theres no reason to treat this like a pseudo valentine's day of the sorts. Cause to think that, is really Missing the point and focus of christmas. My two cents worth.

209: Earwax

DJ BC's work... this time he's taken Frank Yankovic's "Hava Nagila" and paired it with Gwen Stefani's "Hollaback Girl" to create a really nice one. The two songs actually mash together quite nicely...all his mash-ups have really interesting concepts behind them. It has this funky sound to it. Oooh.

Here's it: Challahback Girl (reform mix)

http://s61.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=2WNJ2RU2VB0NN3OVZWZECFB492


good stuff i tell you.

208: The First Noel

I feel that keeping positive is something that i have to constantly remind myself to be. Some people have it lucky for them to keep the positivity for a longer period of time. Good for you, and for my part, I am working towards it. Today was the caroling at Tan Tock Seng hospital. Prior to that, we had singing practice in church for an hour. Mich did a really good job in coordinating the choir, and Lydia plays gospel music really well. Gospel music is harder to practice because the base is usually chords, not like classical music. Most people are better off playing with the classical music types cause ABRSM exams are of those, at least the A grp of songs. Never mind. Anyways, she's got the tempo and the zest in her playing. So it makes the choir sing in a more uppity manner. We sang at the atrium at TTSH. Some hiccups though. Like chinese words we mumbled through and as such. The crowd was sporting, you see pple clapping along. The feeling is quite nice then, but it isnt overwhelming emotions of the sorts. Next we went to Dover Hospice. Anyone with a heart will feel this ache within when you see the toothless smiles of the old folks there. Our presence and half baked songs almost had this incandescent effect on their mood. Makes me wonder am I too sense-less, or without-a-sense to not be able to appreciate simple joys. Or do i have to wait till when im at my death bed before i can learn to love the simplest of things. I teared while singing, looking at an old woman waving her hands as we sang. It totally cracked my heart. Are we really singing from our hearts or is it just lip service we are giving to these people who truly feel blessed to have us around. Something tells me that we are not seeing this visiting in the same emotional importance as they do. Which makes me feel inadequate, and a bit of a fluke. Anyways, i finally found the candycanes, after scouring for ages. It was at the most blatant and in-your-face place. Cold storage at Novena Square, which Rach had apparently rang the folks at cold storage up, but they said they hadnt anymore stock of candycanes. Believe me, I prayed about this. God has his ways, does things you never really know how. Before that Bev Tan and myself had fixed the towels, and today Rach did me a great favour by decorating the canes with me. Service was good, albeit a taddy bit too short. Puden was songleader this time round, with Eddie and Bev Tan as co-leaders. Sebastian wasnt ard, so the group was short of a drumist. That made the performance a little lacklustre and wasnt able to pack in the ooommph. I am darn tired, and basically too moodless to do anything. My relatives from germany came, we supped together. And my bro got into SJI which is weird cause i cant see my bro as SJI-ish. Just hope he doesnt turn into an English Potato head after 4 yrs.

207: A pENNY BLACK FOR UR THOUGHTS, MISSY

Vivian is officially 20! This is the pretty Vian aka, BDD. Heee..she was trying to keep a straight face! So is my good friend, ah dot . We had a goood time at Penny Black with frozen lime margarita which is a ripoff. Bleah.It was a pretty sight, both the girls i was with, and the singapore river. At about 10 plus, the sexay Mama-sabai decided in a eureka moment in the toilet to spray water at me while i was peeing (for a moment i thought it was raining men..hur hur) and decided on getting Ba Dang Dang (ber-dangdang) a birthday cake. ( we thought ba-dang is the only decent word that gives credit to vian =) But i only had a buck-aroo with me,and one teeny buck-aroo is going to get you nowhere, and no cake, except maybe one random roti-prata kosong. So i got back, got my bag, (hee) and scooted with sexay mama to coffee bean where we got a brownie in a bag with 2 candles.

( A red Vian with my two curly fingers. A Peace with a Twist.)


Excuse was that the mama stained her skirt Real Bad, then she digressed and talked about the number of times that happened to us in rv, which is besides the point really. The mama went ahead to take some pictures, one of which had me feigning that distant look.

The penny people took a long time to sing the birthday song for BDD. Until when BDD wanted to go to the toilet, them we saw them struggling to light the candles. Hee...so heres BDD making a wish, see above top. =) A very serene shot i must say!

BDD was paiseh, but cannot leh its her birthday, it has to be a taddy bit noisy. So we sang the song loud loud, and i saw a shy smile from vian. She must be feeling so touched. Right? heh. It didnt seem that long really, but somehow it was 12 plus when we left, after goofing around and drawing eyeliners for the girls, faux-pro style. It sounds shallow, but i would think its innocent fun, cause i have known these two girls for 8 yrs each, and i do feel connected to them. This seems like the start of a sob emo story from the bygone era..gee! *tear* I do treasure these friendships which took so long to develop.

Anyways, Wilson was gracious to send all of us home, and we had some serious backseat action, hahah..the girls laa. Take your brain out of the gutters okay. Hahah..So i stayed over at Mama's hse. As usual we always do some random stuff like taking out the photo album. Reminicise about the past like grannies with knitting kits.

We were so level-headed then. Literally straight hair, no layering, leveled up. Any tinge of layering is considered A Fancy-schmanciful Hairstyle by Ah Look. Fungi heads, each one of us, balancing a blooming stock of button mushrooms on our top, as what is commonly called, hair.

The guys, also fungi heads, were habitats of bird nests on their own. heh.

After i slept, mama told me in the morning that i couldnt keep my fat flopping mouth shut that night!. And she wanted to drop something inside. I suppose the something meant like something of a random six;legged insect, not money. So evil! But its not my fault that her room does not have enough oxygen! Or maybe it is because mama's behind was the first thing smack at eyelevel when i opened my eyes.

We met again later in the afternoon, had dinner, accompanied sb's to J salon to do her hair. Its really a breath of fresh air. =) By then i was toooo tired to go out, and of course too tired to go zouk. I'm sorry, Yo. Tuesday's still on right?

On another note, I got news that the caroling went on good. Thats a sigh of relief, considering most of us cant really hold a tune that steadily. I think an evil christmas grinch bought up all the candycanes in the stores. Urgh, cause i need it by Fri, and even my last glimmer of hope, Marks and spencer, has it not. Booo..i would have to settle for random chocolates at last resort. Later's going to be another full day. I'm meeting him for lunch and then its bbq at es' and jacob's place. Lucky laa all of them, all stay at Bishan. Poor me has to rock on the bus from the west end for cell. It totally rocked my world man.

Thank goodness my hanky-Cranky mood has discarded its owner. My mood is more uppity and the steps do feel more springy and light. Hope that this bouncy mood sustains till the time i see my NEW stats tutorial. Heee heee, i think i'll most likely bust that Crank-ometer. hahah

Chicken wings and marshmellows does make pigs fly, and it makes the world go round. aaaahhh..I just love its candy-coat~! And that is what makes porky spreads its wings of love and fly to Bishan. yaaaaaay.

206: A cranky witch from the south

Today was a sweet one. Met Sihui, Yo and Bin @ cityhall, dinner was at kennyroger's. There was no awkward silence of the sorts. I am really touched by Yo. She came today with a humongous pack of nougarts in a big pack, with at least 100 of them inside and gave them to me. I was shocked. It was those random comments i made on msn when Yo asked me what i would like for her to bring from aust. So i said, "nogurts". But i was thinking of maybe a few. I even forgotten i had said that. It just warms my heart to think that Yo had brought back such a big and cumbersome bag of nogurts. I fully appreciate.



We had a good catching up, but Bin stayed only a while. She had to leave to meet her friends.Then we went to New Asia Bar. View is good, looking down from upthere, it feels kinda surreal. Lots of expats. Urgh, i feel so fake talking about this kind of stuff. Anyways, I like the company. We had a nice time catching up, but i suppose due to the time lapse, the talk didnt come across as spontaneous everytime.



Funny how i go out everyday, come back at mostly past midnight for most days, but the whole day feels like its on a whirl. Its like clockwork. Again, i dunno how to ascertain people's intentions. Yes, i tapao-ed my stats. So am i suppose to bawl? I am really buggered off by random people msg me, people i have not spoken since last sem, asking me about my results, and how i feel. Isnt it obvious, i cant be feeling over the moon right. To set the record straight, I am tired of the whole process, that is making me sick, not the grades. I tell them how i feel, they say are you ok, are you ok. Now you just stop talking to me and I'll be ok. Why the sudden concern from out of no where. Misery loves company i guess, so when they get lousy results, they poll the handphone book for people. Thing is we have never talked for so long!


I don't understand why the tactlessness in handling people's feelings. At this moment i feel like a nasty old witch from the south. Which is a terrible feeling. How can I fully serve God and give glory to his works when its all angst i feel. Very inadequate about how far I'm falling short of it.


Frankly, i am so weathered by constantly being around people 24-7, and getting cranky for not having alone time. But, i have to go out later, and tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow. Gee, i have to go out for the whole of next week, and I dunno how am i gonna do it, but i am, somehow. Actually, i have this want to just off my handphone and go out to somewhere quiet. Just away from the buzz.


I am missing Peiyu so badly now. She has been gone for a week. Funny why i never missed her when she was here though at times we won't meet for 2 weeks. Cause i know she will understand. Half the time these confusion within is all suppressed beneath, which is making it more and more confusing for me. As Holly puts it, "you search for answers you get more questions". This nagging feeling is frustrating. Now i just hope Py will come back soon. I am tired of braving a front.


I am praying for god's guidance.

No 205: Make up ur mind like a little prissy GURL

I am getting totally spun around. First its angels, as gifts, fullstop. T hen its angels plus candles. OKay. Then its angels, sorry..no more stock, need to buy foam angels and line it silver/gold. OKAY. then its angels, can we add muffins? You want big or small muffins..how many how many? OKAAAYY. Anything. Small big medium gigantic miniscule tiny. Anything. Then its..sorry ah, for the angels, the TRBC write in small letters or capital letters?? (you decide larh!) Merry christmas hor, write one line or two lines? (wah lau eh..ANYTHING!) left or right? (&#*#(# middle! middle finger!!) Thats not all.. "sorry but i just thought muffins are not too good for the old folks. some diabetic, some toothless." (OKAY. BRING IT ON) "towels? towels? good? are you there? i need a reply." (yeeeeeessss missy? at ur service. anything anything anything!? "towels wrapped in ribbon can? what colour ribbon? with the angels?" (!!!!!!!) The committee decides on gifts like LITTLE girls dressing up barbie. Wah lau...which part of anything do you not understand!? So after much deliberation, or pouting and fussing. We have decided on mummifying the angels in red towels. JOY. Can it be a more wham bam decision. I am so drained. My brain is in washing machine mode now. tumble pls. now..."hee hee...how do you want to fix the angels to the towels." (smack forehead) Glue, stapler, scotchtape. AAAANNNYYTTTHIIIIINNGGGGG!!!!

No 204: Jerky angels build good camaderie

(cute ol' silly pic)


Camaderie is not something that can be forced down your throat. So there. I don't believe in building camaderie when it feels pretty obvious that the level of engagement is limited. Why constipate ourselves right?


Anyways, I am happy that we have Finished making the gifts for the homes that we are going to visit on the caroling days. Spent like a good 3 hrs odd today making those. We have this styrofoamed, flat angels lined in silver and gold. Then we are going to poke a hole thru the angel's wings and attached it to a small bag of muffins. Andrea and Rach are making the muffins, hee..im spared.


We have some loose ends to tie. For one, we haven even settled for the lead. First it was Titus, then he cant make it. So it was Zhiyuen, then he is also not free, and now i have zero idea who's it gonna be. Very last minute.


Oh ya. We will be performing at tan tock seng hospital on the 21st or 23rd. =)



Thats if you wanna come down and take a look-see. We'll charm your socks off with our xmas song medley. heh heh.

No 203: spinning on the R&B

This song is damnofantabulous!

Back Of The Club
Remixed version from :Mashonda, feat G

http://rapidshare.de/files/9279957/01_Back_Of_The_Club__Rmx__Feat._G.m4a.html

edit: mixed by DJ finesse

No 202: Rooty toot toot and Rummy tum tums

After the looongest time, Sihui and I finally met. Finally met up at holland v! We sort of distanced this yr, cause i was dealing with some issues and somehow was kind of woozy headed. Makes it hard to grapple with day to day comings. Anyways, we met outside bodyshop. I was late
=(. boo. And my phone batteries were just about as flat as i am (waves to my fellow flattie *beam* yoyo!) Double boos.



So it was off to sushi tei. There was this feel-the-water moment, cause i hadnt quite ascertain if she was mad at me for my disappearing act. She wasnt! =) Thank goodness. That was followed by an around-the-world cum villager at harry's. I love this girl. Seriously.



Hee..weird enough we started yakking about the things under the sun, the mysterious jansen, or was it jason? And this kenny boy. hahaha..about some deserted toilet at ntu, lib2. What else...and oh..this hmmm..this other person. Never mind. Whats important is that we had a great laugh. Majorly OTT type of crackling, gagging, gut-wrenching humour. I didnt even realise that we have that many mutual friends. Funny. Small world.



Church-wise, we had carolling practice. Off key squawking aplenty. I was a tad bit bored. Not too good to say that though. =( Major bummer of today was that my scented lotion mysteriously opened itself up, and cozied its contents in my green bag. At first i didnt realised. Then Jeremy was saying he smelt makeup and perfume in the lift. I was hmmm?? What are you talking about. Damned lotion. Now everything is moisturized, except my face. Even my ipod has this oily sheen to it. I love that scent from crabtree & evelyn, BUT not when it is splattered everywhere in the bag. What crap.


Have yourself a merry little xmas, cause i know mine will be GOOD. so you should go have fun too!

No 201: I will run like a mermaid.

Don't listen to bossa nova tracks whilst on the treadmill unless you wanna fall asleep. The rhythm is a tad bit slow, and you start running like a mermaid.


gee. Anyways...a happy bday to Ah Dot and Vivian. I love both of you. Serious. And..we are planning a 2j outing, tentatively on the 28th or 29th, Sabai's gonna bring our sec1/2 photos. We are so going to laugh ourselves silly over our mushroom heads. Those were the days where thigh high socks and neck high outdoor bags were so keeewwl. Or so we thought. =)


note to vian: can hint us what you want for ur bday? sb and me totally dunno what to get for u! =)

No 200: completely dotty

It just never seems to match. The easier, the more indifferent a reply does little to cover the pinch inside.


I guess people are more or less dispensible. Or wait, is it just me.


I prayed about it and was thinking of a tactful way of putting it across. In the end its a letdown. What to do. Dispensible what. deal with it lor.


Its pretty perplexing now as i recall the past meetings. Am i just there to make up numbers? Like "please come so that so-and-so will come", thanks ah. I am like what? comic relief is it.

No 199: Have your cake and eat it too.

I feel that drug free campaigns in Singapore are overhyped. Not because they aren't as important a social cause but that other social issues are not dealt with, with enough regard. Frankly speaking, nobody talks about eating disorders around here, although it is plain to see that many females are obviously disordered in that sense. So you have drug rehabilitation centres, alcoholics annoymous, is there any support group you see here for people with ED? This whole issue is totally swept clean underneath the carpet. The thing is people seldom see beyond the root problem, or at least, people who have not encountered these ED.


It is easy to stamp a frivolous term like that of a 'fussy vainpot' to girls who are overly concerned with their weight. Seriously, how many girls can hold their own, be themselves, and not get so flighty over their weight? There are more underlying causes to ED. First, the body image perception. The level of self-esteem being tied to the numbers on the scales. Really we have been bombarded by this barrage of slimming centres ads, all hyping about weight loss. I am not saying that people are not perceptive enough to hold their stand and that all of them get all rolled up into the ads like tumbleweed. But I don't see it as a particularly healthy influence or whatsoever.


There was a period in jc where i lost a crazy amount of weight. Not that i intentionally started off with that in mind, but hockey trainings were physically exhausting. It pushes you to the point of total fatigue, so much so that you didnt know your body was actually capable of doing that crazy amount of squats and all. That was serious calorie blasting. Soon before i knew, it became really interesting to see the fats melt off, the number on the scales falling [the hair also =(], and finally, i didnt know i had a ribcage till then. I didn't recognise my body, the change was too fast, so i still felt like a fat kid in a relatively thinner body. Now in retrospect, it was insane, losing about 10 kg plus in one month odd.


The hockey girls were really fit, and in secondary school my 2.4km timing was always hovering around the just pass region. The last couple of hundred metres was the most excruciating. Prolly akin to dragging a cow to slaughter. At hockey, the coach made us duckwalk up this very steep slope, then do a burst up the final stretch of the slope. Ten repitions we were supposed to do, and by the 7th, most of us were basically kissing the grass. I digressed anyways.


So it got to a point that i was actually hooked on this adrendaline high. I needed to run everyday, and it almost reached the point of obsession. The whole day i was thinking of ways to train so that i could be the fastest person on the girl's team. Insane. At the peak of my exercising frenzy, i ran 60 km per week, and i remembered i ran 27.1km on a particular day.


I suppose this sounds like a really healthy lifestyle, that is if you eat the adequate amount of food to match the calorie melting. Of course i didnt. I remembered feeling really woozy in the head. While on the bus, i held on to the bar handles really tight till the skin around my knuckles were really all taut and whitish. The dizzy spells were frequent and i didnt want to faint on the bus, so that was the only way to go. During that period, (it sounds very warped to say this), i felt immensely strong inside although i was kind of frail. You feel that you don't exactly need to eat. Honestly, I felt no temptation at all even when others were to stuff a cake under my nose. Its like you attained nirvana from food. Totally hard to grasp, but ya, i felt something to that extent.


It is not only me that went through that period. My cousin's friend died of an ED, and i do know of some friends who told me that they were clawed by this before. Obviously there are girls out there who are suffering from a distortion in their body image. But again, this issue is simply not getting enough due attention. If you were to bring this problem to the root causation, isnt the over concern about weight a intrinsic lack of self-confidence? I mean that is the way is seems to me because if you are truly proud of yourself, isnt the body just a house for the soul?


I can go on and rattle about this topic, but i must admit that it is difficult to go beyond the physical. Ultimately, if you were to look towards the long haul, it is by far better to concentrate more on developing the interior. The exterior concerns are overhyped, the interior concerns are understated. Maybe inate qualities are a better focus to life, rather than this relentless pursuit for a some-body.


Food for thought.

Finally a decision has been reached. So it is muffins for the older people and candycanes for the kids as gifts. Actually i thought that the majority of the youths from the three services will be coming down for the caroling on the 21st and 23rd. So i didnt really get it when Rachel mentioned about getting caroling commitments. Now i do. =)


The message on Sunday touched me greatly. How often do we base our assumptions on a person's worth just on the physical, or get easily turned off by them because of a conflict in opinions or even simply the way the person carries themselves. I guess i seldom have the love and patience to venture further as long as i think the other party may be this or that. Which is really unfair so to speak. Little irks that get prevents further understanding, i dunno if its the result of being judgemental or having not enough love in the heart. Or prolly its both.


Esther said this in cell last sat,

''His love is unconditional but his blessings arent. They come with obedience."

Had this inexplicable sense of realisation at that very point. Very true, how often have i turned away out of convenience sakes. Hmm, its quite hard to verbalize these thoughts but anyways it is very real, the extent of the experience entire.

just penning some thoughts.

Trip recount. Way from the boat ride to Bintan i was really feeling skeptical about the whole trip. Not so the conditions of the place but rather if i could keep my focus on the objective of the trip. My mind tends to stray at times, in an attention deficient way. For starters, i didnt go Bintan for a chocolate back rub of the sorts. More banana tree than banyan tree. (banana is not a tree actually). Anyways, the place i went is abit rundown. We stayed near to where the locals stay, in this way it is much easier to reach out to them.



The purpose of the trip was to visit the locals whom the local church has reached out too. There is this children daycare centre run by the small church, called Kiddy Care. And it was there that we had a more indepth understanding of the locals. They are mostly malays, some chinese though, but most of them speak teochew. So it made communicating about the simplest matter a tedious task. Pretty much like small on talk, big on gesturing. Comic relief though. =)



Soon we were in our groups. Ricky, Abi, Jon and myself. I never did really converse much to Jon in church but i find him very nice to talk to though the trip. Sometimes talking to people and looking them in the eye does wonders in communication. Abi was really quiet, Ricky had a gd sense of humour.



The entire village is built above water. This makes the water very clogged up as people dump their rubbish into the sea and overtime it gets all sludgy. Not a delicious sight. A floating packet of nasi lemak was spotted dancing around the water surface. The people in the town are very friendly by singapore's standards. They don't slam the door on your noses, but you could detect an air of wary about christian groups visiting them. There was this house which we passed by. Quite a perplexing sight i must say.



You see incense stick holders framed beside the door, a bagua over head, a statue of Jesus in the house, but the people who inhabit the house look like malays. So i couldnt really get where are their religious inclinations. It was kind of all over the place. It seems that dua peh gong is the hot favourite amongst the village community. The houses were built along the aisles of a wooden pathway that stretches towards the sea. The pathways do split at some junctures so that people from a side of the village can cut across to the other side. These connecting paths are also made of wood, but they are a little more shaky. So the possibility of dunking into the water is not a remote one.



I was taken aback by the pace of life at Bintan. It seemed almost too quiet. At its best, serene, or rather at times, static. The mid-day sun was absolutely intense, so i guess it made most people really drowsy at those times. Occasionally there was a paddle pop man who rides around, with this unmistakable paddle pop tune tooting along. Other than that, there was not many activities.



So i must say this is indeed a humbling experience, it shifts some of those self-directed thoughts more towards others. Makes me realise that its pretty pointless to be all wrapped around the nitty-gritties. It is all rather me-centred, and mostly does little to solve any problems. I don't know if this new perspective will stay with me for long, cause usually people are more clear headed after a trip. Somehow, these thoughts fraternise with the daily dosage of flighty thoughts and the essence of the experience dilutes itself to a mere memory. And after long enough, it just remains as a stampmark on your passport. Thats it. Hope this is an exception though.



There was this family that left a deep impression. They have this little boy of 12 yrs who is blind, and deaf. As such, he cant talk, because there is no way he can after two senses shut down on him. He is really tiny, like the size of a 4 yr old. So you can imagine that he is really cooped out in his own world. No way of expressing how he feels and no form of communication. It is really heartwrenching to see the little boy just feeling his way about randomly, and having no concept of the world. I mean these are not issues you come about in everyday living. So, i dunno, i mean there was this barrage of emotions that came. Half of it you can feel tears in your eyes, half of it is frustration directed. I mean just what can you say when you see such. So convenient it is to sigh in empathy and soon forget about it, but others have to live with this disability. It just creates this tension within me i dun quite know how to explain that exact feeling.



There were other visitations too, and a couple more on 21st and 23rd when we go on our carolling rounds in the charity homes here. It is really hard to dispel the tension inside! geee..its just totally perplexing. So you can see this trip is far from a spa treat. Somehow its just really different this time round, totally fulfilling on all levels.

On the Ipod (1)

1) Lovefool ;)
-the cardigans-

http://rapidshare.de/files/8802155/Lovefool.mp3.html

2) Thats When I Love You
-Aslyn-

http://rapidshare.de/files/8802967/Aslyn_-_That_s_When_I_Love_You.mp3.html


3) My Cherie Amour
-stevie wonder-

http://rapidshare.de/files/8803996/Stevie_Wonder_-_My_Cherie_Amour.mp3.html


4) The Last Waltz Engelbort

http://rapidshare.de/files/8804199/076THE_LAST_WALTZ_ENGELBORT________________.mp3.html


5) Spanish
-craig david-

http://rapidshare.de/files/8804421/11-spanish.mp3.html


6) One Thing
-Amerie-
http://rapidshare.de/files/8804551/05_One_Thing_Feat.Vic_Damone.m4a.html


7) Family Affair ;)
-mary j.blige-
http://rapidshare.de/files/8804746/mary_j._blige_-_family_affair.mp3.html


8) Feels so good
-shola ama feat amerie-
http://rapidshare.de/files/8804971/SHOLA_AMA-___Ms_Dynamite_-_Feels_So_Good.mp3.html


9) Ghetto Superstar
-mya feat pras-
http://rapidshare.de/files/8805161/Pras___Mya_-_Getto_Super_Star.mp3.html


10) Opp ;)
-naughty by Nature-

http://rapidshare.de/files/8805357/Opp.m4a.html


Enjoy. Hope that it does help make your day!

SO tired now. Many sms and some calls i have missed. Sorry. My phone has no autoroam. =) you want to help me upgrade my plan a wee bit? i have a bit to say about the trip to Bintan, not Batam (i thought it was batam), but maybe after some sleep.